Bye Bye, Bink!

My little girl amazes me.  Truly.  

Being an anxious person in general, I tend to also be anxious as a Mommy.  Shocking, right?  Most milestones we approach stress me out.  I worry if Brianna is ready.  I worry if she is on track.  I run through different scenarios constantly.  This long post is all about how Bri finally kicked her worst habit... and I'm writing about it so I remember all of the little details.  And I'm sure I'll wonder how I did this if baby #2 ever comes along.  

Well... everyone warned me... the sooner you break the pacifier habit, the better.  I made the mistake of letting her keep it much longer than she should have.  The time to get rid of it once and for all came months ago.  But I knew we were DRIVING to Florida in May for vacation and the thought of driving 16 hours each way without the assistance of her pacifier was enough to send me into a full panic attack every time. I decided that after our trip there would be no more pacifier (we call it a binkie or bink in our house) and I really wanted to start working on potty training as well.  We've been back for three weeks and I was getting more and more anxious.  I began reading blog after blog and any bit of research I could.  I was worried that I was going to psychologically damage my sweet girl and if I'm being honest I was stressing about how much sleep I was going to lose, staying awake with a crying baby.  

After reading about many, many methods I decided to go the "Binkie Fairy" route.  For the past week she has only been allowed to have the bink in the car and when going to sleep.  She liked the idea of having the fairy leave her a surprise but when we talked about how the fairy was going to take all of her binks to other little babies who need them she thought about this deeply and looked up at me with those huge, innocent, gorgeous brown eyes and said, "but I need it, Mommy".  And I melted.  As the week went on she grew MORE attached to the darn thing.  And I was officially freaking out.  

I have been trying to figure out what little gift would be appropriate.  What does a Binkie Fairy bring?  What would be exciting enough to her that would lessen the pain of losing one of her favorite comfort items? (Luckily her blankie (kiki) is her absolute favorite... and that isn't a habit I have to worry about breaking.)  I just couldn't decide.  

And then it happened.  Yesterday she didn't have her bink all day.  She had it for a few minutes while I was making dinner and she was resting on the couch but then at bedtime she was cuddling with her Daddy in our bed and she went to sleep without even asking for it.  When I moved her to her crib and she woke up she didn't cry for it and I didn't place one in her crib.  As I crawled into bed I figured I'd be up within an hour with a crying toddler.  I woke up three or four times throughout the night worrying about her.  But Brianna???  She slept.  All night.  Not one peep out of the little angel baby.  

Brianna was still asleep when I was leaving for work so when Shirley got to our house I let her know that today was the day.  No bink.  This wasn't a problem because Shirley is amazing and hasn't been giving her the bink except for nap time for months.  I gathered all of the pacifiers and put them out of sight and told Shirley to tell Brianna that Mommy would take her shopping for a surprise later this evening.  

When I got home from work Shirley said that Brianna only asked for it once and when she told her no, she was fine with it.  Brianna was super excited to see me and we headed out to Toys R Us.  I don't know that she has been in that store since she was a baby so her little eyes lit up and she was so excited.  Before entering, I explained that only big girls get to go to stores like this one.  I let her know that she could pick out some toys but that there would be no more binkies.  We had a blast walking down each aisle.  My girlie girl doesn't even discriminate against toys for little boys.  She loves them all.  She is so sweet though and asks before picking things up and always, always puts each toy back without even the slightest hesitation.  She ended up selecting a new baby doll, a little car seat carrier, and some lip gloss.  I also let her grab a few new bath toys which I've been meaning to pick up.  

Brianna and I both fell in love with this wagon!

Brianna's new baby doll and car seat.

When we got home she didn't waste any time... we played with her new baby and then had dinner.  She had a bath with her new toys and was tired because she didn't take a nap today.  I felt a little anxious about how the bedtime routine would go but it couldn't have gone more smoothly.  She asked for her bink once but when I gave her the new baby instead she was completely fine.  She fell asleep quickly and I was and am seriously in shock.  

I am so incredibly proud of what a good little girl she is becoming.  She bravely accepted this change and I am amazed.  If I'm being completely honest, I have to mention that this transition has left me also feeling a little sad.  Other than those dang diapers, the pacifier really is one of the last things that remain from that baby stage I miss so much.  How has it gone so quickly... seriously?  

I wouldn't be surprised if we have a few challenging moments over the next couple weeks, but I am ready for it.  My sweet girl is just a couple months away from being two and a half so now its time to get serious about this potty training business.  I know it won't take long once she sets her mind to it so in the mean time I will be attempting to remain patient and calm.  I am so in love with our little curly headed sweetheart and thank God daily for the incredible gift that He gave Michael and I.  We love you, Brianna!